What is your favorite feature? Most women have at least one feature they love about themselves. For some, it’s their long legs. For others, it may be their beautiful smile. For me, it has always been my hair. Is it vain of us to have a favorite feature? I don’t think so. I think it's important for us to love ourselves…as long as we don’t put ourselves above others. But what happens when your favorite feature changes, gets older, wrinkled, gets stretch marks, or falls out?
This is where I am today. My hair is falling out…by the handfuls.
My pillows and bedding are covered with my hair every morning. The bathroom floor and counter are covered from my morning brush through, and the brush is full. I empty the brush and clean up the rest. I take a shower and my hair falls out by the handfuls. It's stuck all down the back of my body. By the time I'm done showering, I have gathered enough to cover a doll's head, if not more. I get out of the shower, let my hair dry a little and then brush again. Once again, my floor is covered. My counter is covered. My brush is full. I leave hair everywhere I sit, everywhere I walk. I am now wearing my hair up all the time just so I'm not dropping hair everywhere. I know it’s just hair, but this is hard. It’s bad and I want to cry.
The Bible tells us in 1 Corinthians 14-15 that long hair is given to women as a covering…it is her glory. All my life, I have been praised for my beautiful thick hair. It is my favorite feature. My long, thick, easily managed hair has made me feel secure, covered. How did it make me feel secure and covered? I don’t know. I didn't realize it did until now. Am I being vain? I don't think so. Am I being humbled by this? Probably.
I have always considered myself low maintenance. I don't spend a lot of time on myself at all. I basically brush my teeth and hair, get dressed and get on with the day…no makeup or tedious hairstyle to fix. What I'm trying to convey is that I know I haven't been vain with my looks. So, what is this feeling I’m having from losing so much hair?
I know I’m not the only one. I’ve heard many women talking about hair loss after having covid. It has made me understand why so many people with cancer shave their heads before there is a noticeable amount of hair loss. Seeing this happen over and over everyday is awful. Even knowing that this is temporary, that it is normal after an illness, and that it has a name…it is still hard.
While I never thought I would write an entire blog post on my hair…I just wanted you to know you are not alone if you are experiencing something similar. As believers, we know that these bodies are temporary. No matter how my body ages or if I lose all my hair… one day, when I reach Heaven, I will have locks of hair more beautiful than I ever had here on Earth. That is where I am placing my focus right now…not on the temporary, but on the eternal.
I look forward to hearing from you all.
Much Love,
LB